I Want U

Saturday, June 19, 2010

How to Foster a Long Lasting Relationship

You remember the feeling you felt the last time you fell in love with somebody? Remember the excitation, the goose pimples, the butterflies you felt in your stomach, you remember how you could not stay one second away from that her without having to think about her, remember when you sit in front of your computer at work and all you could look out is her picture set as your wallpaper, when the system times out her picture still remains your screen saver.

These feelings are every bit natural when we connect to the ones we love, it is not abnormal for a man or a woman to feel that way; the BIG QUESTION is this, why do these feelings fade away after sometime? Why does it linger for sometime and not forever? Why does she/he become
so uninteresting after sometime? Why then do we talk about break up? It really baffles me when things like this happen, but the problem lies within us.

Getting a soul mate is what everybody desires, every man needs a woman and so does a woman need a man. No matter how hard we try to hide our feelings; for those women who play hard to get, I know fully well that in the secret place of your heart you still desire a man, you still have a crush on somebody.lol. That is by the way, let us focus more on getting a soul mate and staying glued to the soul mate.

How do we intend to foster a long lasting relationship

1. Be Yourself (Don't Tell Lies)




I laugh when I see a young man trying to pull up an impression of what he is not, he flaunts his friend's car and even clothes so as to impress a lady. The big question is this; for how long is he going to continue in living a false life? How long does he think it is going to take before the lady finds out? First things first in a relationship is to act natural. Remain firm in the tone of your voice; sometimes we try to change our accent just to sound sweet to the lady. It's good though but, believe me I have tried it and it worked.lol. The downside is that as time goes on, maybe three four months into the relationship, you begin to sound normal again and then she thinks you have changed, she thinks you are no longer sweet. My candid advice is to start of real, with everything natural.

You must have heard that most women like to listen to lies. Yes! It's sweet to tell sweet lies to make her go crazy; that's if it is a fling. If you are in for a serious long lasting relationship, I repeat please STAY LIE FREE! The moment your spouse realizes that you have been living a life full of lies, the trust is betrayed and then the relationship begins to crumble slowly; quarrel abounds because there is no more trust.

Let me tell you a little story; Jackson 27 was a Janitor in a top Insurance Company. After work one day, he was standing at the road side hoping to get a cab and then he locked eyes with this alluring damsel, his eyes skipped a beat and then he caught a hold of himself, walked up to her and opened up a conversation. He introduced himself to her and she introduced herself as Sharon and they kept talking, along the line she asked him what he did for a living. Jackson told her that he worked with an Insurance Company. Sharon was bent on knowing his designation in the Company and s she asked further, Jackson lied he was the Managing Director; unknown to Jackson, Sharon's brother happened to work in that same Company. They exchanged numbers and Jackson left. Sharon got home and asked her brother about the Managing Director of the Company where he worked; she was so excited but to her utmost disappointment her brother told her the MD did not go by the name Jackson. She was dumbstruck that she called Jackson immediately, the young man started blabbing and that was it. She called the shot immediately.
I repeat do not pretend to be somebody else, it does you know good. You only get the pleasure for a while and before you know it, you have lost it all. It is better to be your little self and find true long lasting love.

2. Be Unpredictable



This applies to both Men and Ladies alike, people do not enjoy the Company of those who do same old things everyday; believe me ladies don't like predictable men. This is the reason why you see a lady in a relationship with a decent and quiet young man, he loves her with his life but he is not spontaneous.Women like spice, they like change, the like variation, they like their man to be able to do crazy things at unexpected times. Doing same things over and over again in a relationship is like eating same food over and over again, one day you get tired of it. Same goes for a relationship, if you want to keep your relationship then you have to be able to effect changes.

2 years ago I saw this movie, I can't remember the name now; but there was this funny scene I kept watching over and over again. The scene showed a young man and his mum on his High School graduation day, his girl friend walked up to him and said " I want out of the relationship" and he said " Why is that"? " What have I done wrong", and she said, you have done nothing wrong, you are a good guy, you are good Company but you are just too predictable.lol. He opened his mouth in awe and she walked away. That was it! So you see my dear friend, you should always do things differently, if you can't please learn how to do it; watch movies, read books... learn from friends and others in a relationship. This is imperative; it should not be taken for granted, that's if you wish to keep your relationship. Guys listen up! You can take your woman out on a surprise sea cruise, take her to exotic places she's never been, you can write her a message in a bottle telling her how much you love her, you could surprise her with roses at strategic places in the house, just do something different; make sure you stand out from the men she's ever dated. That gives you an edge and believe me, she would never want to be without you.

3. Build a strong friendship

Your romantic relationship needs to have the stability and deep roots that come from a strong friendship. With a meaningful friendship as its basis, your relationship becomes stronger and more lasting.

When you work hard to construct a strong friendship, you can be assured that your relationship is ready to weather whatever life may throw at you in the future.
If your goal is to create a stronger bond with your partner, take the time to think about what it is you'd like from your partner. Give those things to your partner, and you'll almost always find the answers you seek about how to create a nurturing relationship.


4. Respect your partner

Always respect your partner in every way to build a lasting and positive relationship with them. Respect is an important building block of any relationship.

Respect your partner not only in a physical sense, but also mentally, emotionally, and spiritually as well.

5. Give 100%

First and foremost, if you want to build a relationship that's positive, passionate, and withstanding, you need to give 100% of yourself. This is one of the most important things for success, not only in your relationships, but life in general.

There's no "50/50" when it comes to giving in a relationship. You've got to give freely of yourself if it's going to work. It's almost impossible to receive from your partner if you don't give in return.


Remember the golden rule. When you fully give of yourself, the other person will see the effort you're making and soon begin to reciprocate with the same type of behavior.